A Lost Voice

I am the voice that is lost within the masses. I am but one voice trying to find her way. No one hears me. I can shout but yet no body will listen. These are lost words. They will fall on deaf ears.
How does one person make themselves heard within the chaos of all this. We are all trying to make ourselves heard. If you do not stand out then you have no hope. Some of us are not blessed with talent so how do we survive when the craving to be more than we are takes over.
I can write a thousand things, express myself in a million ways and yet I still get lost within those that say nothing but stand out because of their beauty.
I feel smothered in a world that has become image obsessed. Creativity seems to no longer stand for what it once did. People like me seem to get buried beneath those that are intent on selling themselves for their 15minutes.
There is no where left to turn anymore. The time has passed where knowledge, intellect, originality and creativity had meaning. Instead all there is, is the pretty folk that cash in on their image.
But beauty is only skin deep right? Beauty has become the thing that seems to drive our society. While those of us who just don’t measure up are just left behind, lost within a world who adores the beautiful icons of today that offer nothing more than their image. What chance does someone like me have?
Some of us look to the few in the spot light that want change, that stand up and want the knowledge, intellect, originality and creativity back. But it seems to often their voices are drowned out and they get caught within the trap of what sells. But everyone has a choice right?
Do these ‘stars’ fool us all into thinking that they cry out for independence, to stand out away from the crowd of Hollywood and to make a difference, when really all they want is for us to hang on there every word that more often ends up being about the studio and buying into their mass produced product. Do these actors sell themselves out just to make a buck? They themselves have become a product, something for the studios to market.
Some actors you can believe have sold out to Hollywood, which is no longer about originality and difference. But others I hold out hope for, but sometimes I waver in that hope.
Vin Diesel has long been someone who seems to refuse to conform as does Michelle Rodriguez, but sometimes you see that they too have succumbed to the machine that is Hollywood. When this man, Vin Diesel produces something like Los Bandoleros it really does restore hope for me. A short film that is so far from Hollywood that it just stands out on its own and manages to tell a story that you want to hear in just 20 minutes and So original that other films from Hollywood with massive amounts on their budget just can’t touch, we have hope. But sometimes it feels its short lived.
You see a flicker of light, then it seems to get extinguished.
Is there any hope for the Quentin Tarantino’, Robert Rodriguez’ ,Vin Diesel’, Michelle Rodriguez’ and a few others of this world to be able to become more than just a cult hero’?
Hollywood seems not to accept these, what I class as true icons. These few people who seem to have talent beyond the confines of Hollywood but don’t get to express it and don’t ever seem to have their talent recognised.
What has happened to our society that people with such vision go unnoticed by the masses? What has happened to our society that these big budget, blockbuster movies with no story, class, creativity or talented actors, out shine movies that have heart, that have creativity, originality and have actors that have the talent to make their characters believable.
I hold out hope that one day we will change, that Hollywood will change. I hold out hope that maybe one day the masses will listen and acknowledge people like Vin Diesel and Michelle Rodriguez for what they stand for and what they represent. Creativity, individualism and a true passion for what they do.
Why do we not as a society hold in high regards originality, creativity, intelligence? What has happened to us?
I feel pity for the youth of today who grow up believing that in order to be heard and seen you have to look a certain way. That having a brain isn’t as important as looking beautiful.
Beauty should not be something that is everything.

Nerves

I started a new job on Saturday. nothing wonderful but its get me back into the world of the working which i have been absent from for a few months. my second shift is today starts at 2pm ends at 6pm only 4hrs easy right, wrong. for those 4 hrs i am completely on my own running the shop. no one there to help. and normally not an issue but the guy i worked with on Saturday, not a helpful guy. don't know where, well anything is, products, gonna have to give myself a crash course today i guess.
i never normally let nerves bother me, I'm a let it happen sort of person, just relax and everything will be OK. so why are the nerves there? they really are taking over. maybe my body is trying to tell me of some impending doom. Man i hope not. its only 4hrs i keep telling myself, what the hell could go wrong, well that majorly wrong in 4hrs. right? or am i just giving myself a sense of false hope?
well theres nothing i can do about it, its going to happen weather i want it to or not, you cant stop, slow down or reverse time, really really wish you could but that just a hopeless dream. just gonna have to get through it the best i can and as long as at the end of it the shop hasnt burned down then i would say it have been a good shift.
so heres to hoping all goes well and i must remember above everything, im not a dumb arse and can handle anything when i put my mind to it.